Tuesday 17 May 2011

Letting Go

Letting go is hard, even when, at the end of the day, it's just stuff.

Journalling reads:

Here it is. All my notes and working from all that time spent in lectures and libraries, at my desk or lying on Robert or Claire’s rooms’ floor working on problem sheets. Figuring out and mainly getting stuck. And occasionally resorting to copying. Good copying, adding in my own mistakes and false starts. I found out what it was like to truly not understand a problem no matter how hard I tried. To sit in concentrated thought for hours and achieve nothing. Or to battle against a slowly retreating tide of knowledge. More and more aware that there is a vast quantity that I will never understand, never know, and an even greater amount whose existence I will never be aware of. But now I don’t really have room for it. I don’t need it and it has done its job. A 2:1, hard earned. But this is not how I measure it. 2 feet of notes in lever arch files might be the sum of my knowledge. But it is not the sum of my experience. Lessons learned, ideas challenged, the pursuit of knowledge because it’s interesting because I want to know, because I love it. Geek! Rushing headlong through a mathematical landscape with friends. Good times. And although this is all behind me, and I might get rid of these files, I will always have this experience. Although, actually, I think I’ll keep one.

It's funny how sometimes a picture doesn't tell you anything. But now I've got the picture, and the page to explain it, I don't mind letting go. Because I know I'll never need to remember the difference between div, grad and curl, know how to mathematically model a financial derivative, or solve a multi-variable partial differential equation. And if I want to know how to prove Sylow's theorem about p-subgroups, it's in my organiser because I wrote it all out in there to help me learn it for finals.

I just might like to remember that I could.

Kisses xxx

P.S. I've been a bad blogger I know, but I totally intend to make up for that in the near future.

P.P.S. It's not too late to check out the London Scrappy Meetup - get in contact with Nat or me if you can make it!

P.P.S. Deep breath....through to another week of ScrapFactor! Thank you so much for voting for me (if you did ;D) and you can head over to see the pages this week.


  1. what a fantastic summary of student days

  2. That's very interesting to read your jounalling. I'm thinking of uni at the moment, thinking of courses, I WAS thinking of maths, but maybe not now!!!! LOL. Gorgeous page, love the ink and all of the gorgeous elements, I love your style :)

  3. congrats on scrapfactor, will check out this weeks LO.
    Jo xxx

  4. Great layout, with fab journalling - a precious memory. Although i still don't understand the passion with mathematical equations lol!! well done on scrap factor x

  5. congrats on ScrapFactor..love the LO!
    Alison xx

  6. congrats on getting thru scrapfactor. Hope it goes well atthe meet up on Saturday, I thought I had emailed you but maybe I never did (I am getting very forgetful in my old age!) enjoy xxx

  7. I love your layout, I never thought of scrapbooking my achievement through uni... which is weird as it played a big part in my life! Thank you for the inspiration..... and congrats on scrapfactor - your layout is fab! :)

  8. I know what you mean about not throwing out uni notes - I've still got all of mine, along with all my text books! When will I ever need to know about Particle Physics now??? Congrats on making it through another round :)